God is perfect. His timing is perfect. His direction is perfect.
He has placed me in the right situations with the right people at the right time. And sometimes, it appeared like things weren't going right - yet they were. I just didn't know it.
I've come to surrender to trying to understand anymore. God knows my heart: I DO desire to understand. I want His Spirit of understanding and His Spirit of knowledge. Yet, He has brought me through situations to break me of this need to know... to understand. Through situations that had me reeling and shaken, I learned to "let go".
By no means was it easy.
I've learned that when I do not understand or know something... just let go, step back, and continue to trust in God. In His perfect time, according to His wisdom, He will make all clear to me. And even if He does not, I shall continue running after Him obediently, trusting in Him completely, praising Him with my whole heart, soul, mind and strength.
Thank you, LORD.
I know that He is with me. His quiet hand has gently moved aside obstacles... lit up the darkness... set my feet on solid ground and kept them from slipping from the strait and narrow. I will fear the LORD all the days of my life. He is love. His love will be found full in me and it will overflow out of me into others. This is the work He is performing in me. It has been a difficult process for me as He has exposed me to things I was not comfortable with. He has crushed me and I cried deeply. He has removed what was familiar and a comfort and I found myself feeling lost and removed. He has allowed me to taste of things and then taken them from me because I was not ready for the fullness of them.
In all of this, I praise the LORD God - my Maker. He is the Potter and I am the clay. May His perfect work be accomplished in me. The breaking and the burning - I welcome them. I rejoice in Him for I know He is the God of my salvation. Though I do not understand what is going on at times - I will not let go of Him. Men will have me judged - but I know that God is my judge. I will show love and mercy to all. I forgive all - for even though they may think they know what they do... the LORD has shown me otherwise. I cried for them because I loved them though they treat me as an enemy. I will always love them no matter what.
I have been forgiven completely. I am loved completely. I shall give what I have been given: Complete forgiveness, complete love.
God has plans to make me whole, complete, perfect, and holy. I submit to His work in me. His perfect will be done, even as He has spoken it so shall it be accomplished. Not one word shall fall to the ground - every jot & tittle shall be accomplished.
I will wait on the LORD. I will not move. I shall rest in Him and be still.
He will do what He has purposed. His way is holy and just. He is my strength and my shield. With my song, I will praise Him.
His will be done.